I hate this kind of mixed feeling. I felt like I’ve no one to talk to. Doesn’t know that things be so wrong. Both parties misunderstood what we trying to tell them. I just want to them take precaution and be aware that people are noticing and asking questions. I just want them ready to face how people looks at them what people talks. I myself already face that kind of situation before, that’s really hard to face it. Its like you wherever you going there’s someone comment or talking behind. I doesn’t mean to spoil the relationship, if I did I already do it from the beginning.
The atmosphere are different now. We used to talk a lots no matter what lame and silly topic. Conversation come out from nowhere. I just want us back to those old days.
Somehow the another part of me still missing you ~ Now both of us having our own relationship, our own life, our own of everything however our memories that bought us together so short yet unforgettable.
Yes, I scare of darkness however sometimes I need to be alone. I finally found a place where I can really be alone by myself.
I felt like he’s ignoring me after I tell him everything. Does he know how pain my heart will be if he keep ignoring and avoiding me.
Because of yesterday rain, I fall sick. How unlucky I am.
Hmmm… Sometimes I wondering can I be selfish once? All these while I put other person priority before myself. This time, can I do what I really want to do for myself? I want nothing more, just wanna stay by his side and accompany until he graduate.
He being so cold to me after I told him everything :((
P/s: I missing him so badly.
How could I tell you I wish we could be together only in here. Everything happened just left it here. You already told me that you don’t wanna see me get hurt anymore. You said can feel that I unhappy as well. As you said we only 2 months, I gonna be alright soon.
How I wish I still could tell you I still love You, I missing you badly and I want you back. However I know I shouldn’t.
I wish to hug you and cry, I really tired acting nothing and being strong.
I want you to be happy and I know you will be happy without me.
P/s: I wish I could tell you everything. If only I have the guts.
I wondering who truly understand how I felt? I knew he knew how I felt, he always can see truth behind everything I trying to hide with a smile. I myself being so stubborn for not accepting the truth that we’re not meant to be together. We cannot be together. I should have let him go however my heart not willing. Arghhhhhh! The mixed feeling can really kill me.
P/s: my only hope for now return if possible.
Last night I hardly holding back my tears. I cried again and again, I don’t want him get hurt again by the same person. Why he so silly? I understand that silly more each day. No one gonna change his attitudes however I still trying my best to change it. I not going to give up on him. Now we only can see each other from far away. There’s some distance between us which we actually so near yet so far.
I wouldn’t ask for more from you. God treated me good enough letting me studying at the same place with you. At least I have the chance to see your face and my favorite smile from your face. Eyes closed for long time and yet mind never sleep waiting for your reply. I don’t wanna miss any chances to chat with you. My previous moment that worth waiting for.
Walking around the campus, I saw our shadows everywhere. I remember I love drag you walking around with me so I could stay by your side longer. The stars,the walkway,under the tree talks, and forth. These memories fresh in my mind like it just happen not long ago. My heart beating so fast, exactly the same when we met every time. However everything just left as memories for me. The heart aching when I realized I could only see your back.
I really don’t want to act strong and pretending nothing happen anymore. I’m tired, do you know? And yet I still need to continue.
P/s : wish come true, saw you once I reach.
When I saw the date I wish to know what that means. It’s a date between you and her? I know until today your heart doesn’t have a place for me. However I still never think of give up waiting for you.
I wish to see you talk to you hug you so badly but I know you wouldn’t wish the same cause you wish to get it from her not me.
P/s : Wish to back to October 2012.
Someday I wish you realize that I never stop loving you, I always be there even you don’t need me. It never easy to forget every single memories and obstacles we had been through. Every ups and downs we hold on each other hand and go through it. After every obstacles we been through, we have to let go of each other because lack of understanding. Somehow I’m still here holding on every promises we made.